da da dum.... BOOM!

Move went.. seems I unpack well.. looks like I have been here forever.. yes.. everything put away.. no boxes around.. pictures hung.. all things sorted.. go figure.. I am a little anal about making it feel like home.. guess that's not a bad thing.. I have to admit though.. when I make a move like this.. I see how much stuff one can accumulate.. and to be honest.. its a bit disheartening.. but then what does one do when Christmas rolls around.. I love the decorations I have.. and yes... that's about 6-8 boxes right there.. and again.. because I have moved to a smaller home.. looks like I will be purging that too.. a part of me still thinks I made the wrong move right from the get go.. I should have just bought that 5th wheel.. would have been cheaper..AND it would force me to keep my sentimental stuff to a bare minimum. Well that's what I think anyway.. and then too.. can you imagine moving day.. okay unhook the hoses.. hook up the trailer to the truck.. let's go... yeah.. all of 10 minutes.. that's so tuff.. haha...
So the first few nights here have been uneventful, in the sleep category that is.. meaning.. I think I am going to sleep.. just doesn't feel like it.. and then last night I had horrid nightmares, and actually took down my innocent bed lamp.. go figure.. not that it did anything wrong.. but obviously I was threatened by it.. poor cat.. that's all I am going to say.. scared the bejeezus out of me.. can you imagine what it did to the poor kitty... ya.. enuf on that subject or who knows when spca will be knocking on my door.. ya he has such a rough life.. I wanna be MY cat.. that little fella has a GREAT life.. right now.. I am watching him climb up my roof.. oh don't worry.. he gets down just fine.. but I have to laugh.. I am about ready to get my shoes on.. and hike up there with him.. would love to see the view he gets.. has to be something.. I mean.. he goes up there pretty much everyday.. wonder if I can get down just as easy as him though.. prolly not.. I might fall and break something.. like my ego.. haha..
ah well.. so.. today was cleaning day at the previous location..and yes.. I had a good cry.. that house holds many wonderful memories.. and amazing views.. it gave me the opportunity to heal..even though in my head.. I feel like I still need much of that in my life.. ah.. who knows what tomorrow will bring..
and isn't that a good thing!... we don't know what is in store for us.. we have hope, we have faith.. we have our imagination.. and I have much prayer.. that I will continue to be blessed...
FAITH

HOPE

LOVE

PEACE

SERENITY

COMFORT

Feet, Feat, Fail

In a few short weeks I will be moving out of the house I moved into back in May of last year... its been an amazing home.. it truly has been my home.. my security..my place where I found some peace.. and a place that has allowed me to heal...needless to say..I am not ready to leave this sanctuary.. literally.. I am struggling with this choice...sadly I did not make this decision alone.. which I guess makes it that much harder.. I can only hope that it would be a good move.. bringing me into a larger city, might allow me to find a job.. or who knows.. maybe its just a step to be able to save some money so I can move on yet again.. funny thing about me.. here I thought I was all about having "roots".. now in my heart and head.. I am toying with the idea of getting a trailer.. and just buggering off.. so tired of this rat race.. trying to make ends meet.. I figured at this age I would have been a lot further along..but there is always something or someone that gets me off my path..
Questioning.. where do I want to be? what truly makes me happy? is there such a thing.. can one truly be completely and utterly happy.. I use to think that.. I use to think there is always a rainbow.. and I have always danced in the rain.. yes I am using metaphors here.. when the going got bad... I did the best I could do and made the best of it..
I guess I should start looking within.. seems that's where the happiness eludes me.. I talked to a friend today.. and he said.. maybe your healing is over.. and its time to let someone else have your spot.. guess that's what bugs me.. I don't feel healed.. so far from it... tired.. tired of looking around.. trying to figure it out...
as an old saying of mine.. "feet don't fail me now!"